December Surprise

I know you've all heard about the October Surprise. The thing that didn't happen that was supposed to be the ultimate weapon in Bush's arsenel. Well, It's just about December, 2004, and I am here to let you know that here's the December Surprise...

After September 11th, 2001, the President urged everyone to go back to business, and BUY from businesses. So we bought...

When sales were down for Christmas 2003, the administration produced the Evil Saddam Hussain. Sales climbed for the last part of the Christmas season...

So we bought it again...

So now, get on your tin foil hats. Got 'em on? Good. Here it is. If sales are down for this holiday season, then trust in getting news about another evil man being captured (Osama or Zarquawi).

You have been warned...end transmission.